Today, the girls and I went to Bay Beach with their grandparents. What an amazing place that costs little ($.25 per ticket, and the rides are not more than 2 tickets; kiddie rides are one), even at the concession stands. I think a hamburger was $1.50. (Don't get the chicken filet - it's fried!). After several rides, watching the smiles on my girls' faces, lunch, ice cream (none for me, of course), and a terrible storm that knocked over a tree, we headed home. We were tired, dirty, stinky, and oh-so-happy. Miss Serious asked that I get a job there so she can be there every day while I work. A two-hour ride is a bit much for a commute, my dear, but I do love your enthusiasm!
We stopped at home to get The Walrus and then headed to the YMCA. My dear friend, Supermiffy, called and talked me into joining a Body Pump class with her tonight. I couldn't bear not to do my usual workout, but time only allowed me 15 minutes for it, and I burned 235 cals. in that time. Well, then I did Body Pump for an hour. I hate that workout, but it hurts so good. It's a cardio/strength training mix, and I am not very strong. Ah, well, I worked out for an hour and half today, so THERE! LOL.
We got a new dog and I have to stop being a brokeass SAHMama and get a job. More on those updates later.
Going to watch Aliens, now. I've never seen it.
P.S. Go see 1408. It's great, and John Cusack totally rocks my boat.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Friday, July 13, 2007
Saturday, July 7, 2007
On December 31st, 2006 I woke up in Newton, MA, right outside of Boston. We were on a mini-vacation for the holiday. I was 13.5 weeks pregnant with my third child.
The bleeding began at about 5:00 a.m. and I knew it wasn't good. I had bleeding in the beginning, but an ultrasound at 9 weeks showed a baby with a heartbeat. I thought I was in the clear. I spent the following 4 weeks under the impression that I was carrying a growing baby. I was even convinced that I was feeling flutters.
Anyway, the bleeding began and when my husband woke up I said we should go to the hospital.
To make a long story short, that baby must have stopped growing shortly after my wonderful ultrasound and we left that baby in the hospital on New Year's Eve. It is a very painful memory of a very painful experience.
It took me a few weeks to decide to get on with life instead of eating my way through it. I joined Weight Watchers, lost a few pounds, then gave it up. I really had no desire to take care of myself or my body. Rather, I wanted to defile it, punish it, fill it with poison.
But after seeing my doctor for my annual exam, I decided that I didn't need to continue to hate my body for losing that baby. I could take control of it and create a healthier environment in which to grow the next baby to full term.
The Walrus and I are not trying to get pregnant right now. In fact, we are actively avoiding it. My reward for getting to a healthy, non-obese weight will be to try to have another baby. It is only fair to the baby, to me, and to my poor body that reaches weights of great proportions when I am pregnant and obese. I delivered an 11 lb. 12 oz baby (via c-section) in 2005.
That's the reason for all this craziness. It's not just about being cute pregnant, you know, like those women with the little basketball bellies that just look adorable and not like they swallowed a hippo. But it's about being a healthy vessel in which that baby will grow.
I am not saying that I lost that baby because I am overweight, but that baby is on my mind right now because he or she would have been born this week. I was due on July 4th.
Independence Day.
So, I am doing it for me, for my health, and for the health of my next pregnancy. I am doing it because I have to, and it's time for me to stop being selfish.
Just some thoughts I wanted to get down somewhere.
The bleeding began at about 5:00 a.m. and I knew it wasn't good. I had bleeding in the beginning, but an ultrasound at 9 weeks showed a baby with a heartbeat. I thought I was in the clear. I spent the following 4 weeks under the impression that I was carrying a growing baby. I was even convinced that I was feeling flutters.
Anyway, the bleeding began and when my husband woke up I said we should go to the hospital.
To make a long story short, that baby must have stopped growing shortly after my wonderful ultrasound and we left that baby in the hospital on New Year's Eve. It is a very painful memory of a very painful experience.
It took me a few weeks to decide to get on with life instead of eating my way through it. I joined Weight Watchers, lost a few pounds, then gave it up. I really had no desire to take care of myself or my body. Rather, I wanted to defile it, punish it, fill it with poison.
But after seeing my doctor for my annual exam, I decided that I didn't need to continue to hate my body for losing that baby. I could take control of it and create a healthier environment in which to grow the next baby to full term.
The Walrus and I are not trying to get pregnant right now. In fact, we are actively avoiding it. My reward for getting to a healthy, non-obese weight will be to try to have another baby. It is only fair to the baby, to me, and to my poor body that reaches weights of great proportions when I am pregnant and obese. I delivered an 11 lb. 12 oz baby (via c-section) in 2005.
That's the reason for all this craziness. It's not just about being cute pregnant, you know, like those women with the little basketball bellies that just look adorable and not like they swallowed a hippo. But it's about being a healthy vessel in which that baby will grow.
I am not saying that I lost that baby because I am overweight, but that baby is on my mind right now because he or she would have been born this week. I was due on July 4th.
Independence Day.
So, I am doing it for me, for my health, and for the health of my next pregnancy. I am doing it because I have to, and it's time for me to stop being selfish.
Just some thoughts I wanted to get down somewhere.
Friday, July 6, 2007
Future MILF Weigh-In... Via Alaska
Last weigh-in weight: --6
Current weight: --6
Pounds lost: 0
Total Lost: 23 lbs.
Thankfully, actually, the scale hasn't budged. Actually, last Saturday, the day we left for Alaska, I was up two pounds, but I wound up getting my period that day, so that explains that. I didn't weigh again until Tuesday, where I was back down to --6, and that is where I sit today. I am happy with this. While I would have liked to lose while on vacation, I am fine with not gaining, either.
It is very hard to do Kimkins on vacation, but I am trying. We get a gourmet breakfast every day that always includes an egg dish, but I am not certain how the eggs are made - probably with milk. I have had some sausage, but have skipped all the toast, fruit, bread and dessert products. I have been doing well that way. Sometimes I have "cheated" and had a wrap sandwich with the wrap, or a little too much dressing (I don't always know the content of everything I am eating, whereas at home, I am pretty much on top of that). I am not charting on Fitday, but will return to that once I get back home.
I really have a serious eating problem, I think. I contemplate quitting this plan at least six times a day (especially when I saw the chocolate-filled pie at the Farmer's Market). I think of all the things I could eat, and I could binge! The amount of food out there that I shouldn't be eating far outweighs what I can eat, and it's torture! But, I just keep thinking about how much it would set me back, how much I really fucking want to be a MILF, and I also think about how 23 lbs. gone has made my hips stop hurting when I get out of the car, my feet stop hurting in the morning when I get out of bed, how it made that dress fit when it didn't fit a few weeks ago, how I can bend over at the waist without losing my breath, how I easily cross my legs, how my pants/capris hang off of me, how I can see myself smaller in the mirror, how I only have 7 more pounds until 30 gone (and that will mark another major goal), how Miss Serious comments daily on how I look smaller, how I don't cringe at looking at my reflection in store windows...
Need I say more? Check out Milfy on the right side of this page. That is (sort of) what I will look like at 130, which I believe is at the top of my range for my height of 5'1". Should I go farther than that? We will see. All I know is I feel better about myself, my strength, my choices.
It's so worth it.
Current weight: --6
Pounds lost: 0
Total Lost: 23 lbs.
Thankfully, actually, the scale hasn't budged. Actually, last Saturday, the day we left for Alaska, I was up two pounds, but I wound up getting my period that day, so that explains that. I didn't weigh again until Tuesday, where I was back down to --6, and that is where I sit today. I am happy with this. While I would have liked to lose while on vacation, I am fine with not gaining, either.
It is very hard to do Kimkins on vacation, but I am trying. We get a gourmet breakfast every day that always includes an egg dish, but I am not certain how the eggs are made - probably with milk. I have had some sausage, but have skipped all the toast, fruit, bread and dessert products. I have been doing well that way. Sometimes I have "cheated" and had a wrap sandwich with the wrap, or a little too much dressing (I don't always know the content of everything I am eating, whereas at home, I am pretty much on top of that). I am not charting on Fitday, but will return to that once I get back home.
I really have a serious eating problem, I think. I contemplate quitting this plan at least six times a day (especially when I saw the chocolate-filled pie at the Farmer's Market). I think of all the things I could eat, and I could binge! The amount of food out there that I shouldn't be eating far outweighs what I can eat, and it's torture! But, I just keep thinking about how much it would set me back, how much I really fucking want to be a MILF, and I also think about how 23 lbs. gone has made my hips stop hurting when I get out of the car, my feet stop hurting in the morning when I get out of bed, how it made that dress fit when it didn't fit a few weeks ago, how I can bend over at the waist without losing my breath, how I easily cross my legs, how my pants/capris hang off of me, how I can see myself smaller in the mirror, how I only have 7 more pounds until 30 gone (and that will mark another major goal), how Miss Serious comments daily on how I look smaller, how I don't cringe at looking at my reflection in store windows...
Need I say more? Check out Milfy on the right side of this page. That is (sort of) what I will look like at 130, which I believe is at the top of my range for my height of 5'1". Should I go farther than that? We will see. All I know is I feel better about myself, my strength, my choices.
It's so worth it.
Friday, June 29, 2007
Future MILF Weigh-In
Starting Weight: --9
Previous Weight: --2 (down 17)
Current Weight: --6 (down 6)
Total Lost: 23 lbs!
That is, 19 on Kimkins and 4 on my own. WOOO HOO. That is 23 lbs in 25 days!
I woke up on Wednesday morning and had my WOOOOSH! 3 lbs. gone overnight (I think this is due in part to some very strenuous activity just a few short hours before. Hee hee). Amazing!! The Walrus is so proud of me, and that helps me be proud.
People still aren't quite noticing yet, but after I told my best friend about it, she mentioned it to her husband who said I was a hottie (read: I'm gonna be a MILF soon!!) and he could tell I had lost weight. Awesome, baby! Fucking awesome.
We are leaving for Alaska tomorrow and I am determined to stick to my plan. I could probably undo half, or more, of all that I have done and what the hell sense does that make.
I have made it through bonfires w/ smores, birthdays w/ desserts, etc. I can certainly stay on plan while in America's Last Frontier.
I have made little tiny cheats here and there without any real punishment (maybe maintaining when I could have lost), but no more cheating now.
I just had an egg white omelet for lunch, and it looked like dessert:
1/2 c egg whites
Several drops Milk Chocolate Liquid Stevia (an artificial sweetener w/o carbs, calories, sugar)
top with: Redi Whip, Walden Farms Sugar-Free Chocolate Sauce, and perhaps some cinnamon if it floats your boat.
YUMMY!!!!! I took a picture that I'll have to post later (because our real internet took a dump and I'm stealing this signal). I was amazed at how tasty it looked, and how tasty it was.
Probably won't post again until at least a week from now... not sure if I'll have a scale.
Join KIMKINS now, people!!
Previous Weight: --2 (down 17)
Current Weight: --6 (down 6)
Total Lost: 23 lbs!
That is, 19 on Kimkins and 4 on my own. WOOO HOO. That is 23 lbs in 25 days!
I woke up on Wednesday morning and had my WOOOOSH! 3 lbs. gone overnight (I think this is due in part to some very strenuous activity just a few short hours before. Hee hee). Amazing!! The Walrus is so proud of me, and that helps me be proud.
People still aren't quite noticing yet, but after I told my best friend about it, she mentioned it to her husband who said I was a hottie (read: I'm gonna be a MILF soon!!) and he could tell I had lost weight. Awesome, baby! Fucking awesome.
We are leaving for Alaska tomorrow and I am determined to stick to my plan. I could probably undo half, or more, of all that I have done and what the hell sense does that make.
I have made it through bonfires w/ smores, birthdays w/ desserts, etc. I can certainly stay on plan while in America's Last Frontier.
I have made little tiny cheats here and there without any real punishment (maybe maintaining when I could have lost), but no more cheating now.
I just had an egg white omelet for lunch, and it looked like dessert:
1/2 c egg whites
Several drops Milk Chocolate Liquid Stevia (an artificial sweetener w/o carbs, calories, sugar)
top with: Redi Whip, Walden Farms Sugar-Free Chocolate Sauce, and perhaps some cinnamon if it floats your boat.
YUMMY!!!!! I took a picture that I'll have to post later (because our real internet took a dump and I'm stealing this signal). I was amazed at how tasty it looked, and how tasty it was.
Probably won't post again until at least a week from now... not sure if I'll have a scale.
Join KIMKINS now, people!!
Friday, June 22, 2007
Future MILF Weigh-In
Starting Weight: --9
Previous Weight: --5 (that is, down 14)
Current Weight: --2 (down 3 lbs.)
Total Lost: 17 lbs.
Between losing a pound, gaining it back, losing it again, and staying the same, I am finally down another pound, which for Kimkins that does not seem like a lot. I lost 11 lbs. the first week and 2 lbs. the second week? I am waiting for a serious wooosh here!
Ironically, yesterday I increased my calories by nearly 3x. I unknowingly spent a few days under 300, and prior to that, a few days under 500. Yesterday I kicked it up to 558. I know this sounds low, but when you're in Ketosis, you don't experience much hunger. Just really nasty breath and the feeling as though you have a dirty diaper sitting in your mouth. But hey, nothing tastes as good as thin feels, right? Anyway, so I brought my calorie intake up and lost a pound. I think my body is throwing a temper tantrum, as they say in the Kimkins forums.
I have a goal in mind for my 30th birthday, which is in September. At this rate, I'm a little behind. I am having a hard time accepting that, and am hoping for a larger loss soon. However, I must surrender control to the diet goddesses and stick to my plan and go with the flow.
My major accomplishment: Yesterday, I went to a coffee class/tasting at Starbucks. My good friend was teaching the class. Anyway, when it came time to do food pairings - with carmel, milk chocolate blueberries, and LEMON CAKE - I gracefully declined. I could have eaten it in the name of experimentation of flavors, but I didn't. I avoided Lemon Cake. What? I avoided Lemon Cake????
I have to post pictures. If other people were reading this, I'd be more on top of things. But since this is just for me right now, I don't need to be reminded that I'm still squishy.
Previous Weight: --5 (that is, down 14)
Current Weight: --2 (down 3 lbs.)
Total Lost: 17 lbs.
Between losing a pound, gaining it back, losing it again, and staying the same, I am finally down another pound, which for Kimkins that does not seem like a lot. I lost 11 lbs. the first week and 2 lbs. the second week? I am waiting for a serious wooosh here!
Ironically, yesterday I increased my calories by nearly 3x. I unknowingly spent a few days under 300, and prior to that, a few days under 500. Yesterday I kicked it up to 558. I know this sounds low, but when you're in Ketosis, you don't experience much hunger. Just really nasty breath and the feeling as though you have a dirty diaper sitting in your mouth. But hey, nothing tastes as good as thin feels, right? Anyway, so I brought my calorie intake up and lost a pound. I think my body is throwing a temper tantrum, as they say in the Kimkins forums.
I have a goal in mind for my 30th birthday, which is in September. At this rate, I'm a little behind. I am having a hard time accepting that, and am hoping for a larger loss soon. However, I must surrender control to the diet goddesses and stick to my plan and go with the flow.
My major accomplishment: Yesterday, I went to a coffee class/tasting at Starbucks. My good friend was teaching the class. Anyway, when it came time to do food pairings - with carmel, milk chocolate blueberries, and LEMON CAKE - I gracefully declined. I could have eaten it in the name of experimentation of flavors, but I didn't. I avoided Lemon Cake. What? I avoided Lemon Cake????
I have to post pictures. If other people were reading this, I'd be more on top of things. But since this is just for me right now, I don't need to be reminded that I'm still squishy.
Thursday, June 21, 2007
The Mighty Stall
Oh my, I sure do hope that for my MILF weigh-in tomorrow that the Woooosh Fairy pays me a visit. That is, I have been sitting at a stall with only a 1 lb. loss so far this week. I have been doing so very well on this plan, but I know that these stalls should be expected. I mean, I went from eating well over my recommened daily allowance of calories, to eating a very small amount. I haven't had a food containing wheat or grain or sugar near my lips in nearly two weeks. Something's gotta happen soon.
Oh, Beautiful and Holy Woosh Fairy, please visit my body tonight and grant me a magnificent loss for all this hard work I have been doing!
Oh, Beautiful and Holy Woosh Fairy, please visit my body tonight and grant me a magnificent loss for all this hard work I have been doing!
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